I feel like I’m both self-destructing and spreading my wings toward freedom. In this moment I feel real and as myself. I sit in a candle-lit kitchen with Ben Harper/Damien Rice on the stereo and a drink. I cry out to the Lord for real freedom—mellow, still, delicate, soft, because words can so easily be written off, but Oh!! Not silence! I yearn for more of these moments by candle light! I need to slow down and listen to the Lord and my spirit’s cry! To get back to my rural roots more often and not be swept away! I can’t ignore the poetry and abstract. I need to embrace what many can’t put into words, because I can! I meet with you, Jesus in the stillness of my kitchen and we dance through uncommon thoughts together. We write songs and poetry, stories and devotionals that the world will never hear or see! I scream to you with my heart the words seldom expressed by busy humans who scurry about to reach an invisible end that they hope to see by their 40s—a place where things plateau and gel and where all change/challenge stops. (This place doesn’t exist) Then they can travel with you in their minds through places, topics and feelings seldom explored! I say no! Take me, Jesus. Take me there now to see you outside the boxes! Outside the assumptions! Free me from my own prison!